I don’t know how to begin

(A little backstory: I found my old blog !!! *cringe* I wrote this poem in 2014. I remember being so lost back then. I remember struggling with my studies and having a hard time trying to fit in. As I read this now, I realized I’ve survived and learned so much in the past two years . And I did learn to dream and live again.)

(UPDATE: Graduate na ako mga bes!)

I don’t know how to begin.

I’m at the point of my life where I don’t know where the fuck I’m heading.
Everyday feels stagnant.
Like a calm river on a Sunday afternoon.
Moving…yet not moving.

I don’t know how to begin.

My mind wanders during class.
I’m there and I am not.
Words flash before my eyes.
Phrases move past my ears.
But still.
Nothing.

Thankful for not failing.
But still not excelling.
Stuck in the middle of the good and the bad.
But nothing pushes me to be better.

I don’t know how to begin.

Sometimes I think I lost it.
The passion for learning
For dreaming.
For living.

Did I?
I don’t know how to begin.

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